Frederic Erk

Posts Tagged ‘Sex’

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Pornography and the levelling of my sexual life

In Uncategorized on January 17, 2010 at 6:40 pm

Pornography

The levelling of my sexual life

Why I believe that pornography is intrusive, offensive and damaging my sexual life


It was a rainy Wednesday of October 1996 as I invited my friend, Mr. Christopher Burton, Oxford 1931 and Head of English studies at Catholic University of Angers, to see the film of Milos Forman, “The People versus Larry Flynt”.

Later as we were leaving the movie theatre, Christopher approached me and asked why on Earth, there was use for nudity in that film. And I was at a loss for an explanation. Of course, the movie was about a pornographic magazine editor, but nonetheless I found he had made a good point.

When I think of eroticism I believe there is nothing as erotic as the love scene at the beginning of “Excalibur” by John Boorman. Not only is the girl beautiful, and she is the daughter of John Boorman in real life, but sex is performed with animal strength. And I think it is beautiful when Merlin stops and turns his head as if to listen, while miles away, in that dark castle, there is orgasm. Yes, the heir of the King is there. That is erotic, meaningful and beautiful.

There is nobility in nudity and sexuality. Of course, it is the way lovers have to communicate intimately. And for the time being, this is the way babies are made.

But there is a trend of eroticism and plain pornography, which is sterile and not even entertaining. Think of Sylvester Stallone with Sharon Stone under the shower of that hotel of L.A. If that is erotic, then really we have a different idea of eroticism. It is ridiculous, and what a waste of hot water.

HBO “Rome” series has pornographic content, but it is so innocent and integrated in the story line that I don’t understand how people could have made such a fuss.

To illustrate what I mean with dirty stuff, there is a French movie, I say movie, not film, because it is not worth that name, and there is a scene when the girl explains to Fabrice Luccini that she has another lover, because he is having anal sex with her, and that it is like coffee and milk.

No nudity is shown, but only a pervert could make up such a dialogue. And believe me, the actress is blushing during the scene. The French film directors have a problem with sexuality. Please read my review of “La Discrète” to understand what a good French film director understands with sexuality.

Even worse pornography has become more and more violent, and there are things on the Internet, which should be banned and prosecuted. I am not talking about watching a beautiful girl naked, even if it is so sad, as it is only an image, but say, the beauty of a woman has inspired so many masterpieces. But that pornography is awful. It is hell.

In France television talk shows you have porn actors and actresses talking about their job. I am not prude, but I mean, if you happen to watch a few minutes of their movies, it is really bad, mean and shocking.

Of course I am not saying that people who watch porn are bad, and Milos Forman made his point when he said that we could watch a nuclear bomb fall upon Japan without blinking, but would cry out in anger, if we see two people making love online.

Well.

I personally am sick, I mean really sick, when I watch a movie with people getting blown away. I used to like war movies, I hate them now. Exactly like I used to track some nice girls online, who were definitely not prude about displaying their charms. But now, we have gone too far, and I am sick with pornography. As a lover, I feel ashamed and hurt that women have to do that for money, exactly like I feel ashamed to see young girls having sex on the streets for a few dollars.

There are limits, and I think we have crossed the lines. Now it is really a matter of human rights. Pornography has a destructive effect on how a man perceives a woman, and vice versa.

I am not talking about prostitution, but as I was sitting on my cot in Riga, I leafed through a magazine, which was full of erotic online services. And the girls were really nice. I admire the courage of prostitutes, as they are servicing what is not working in men’s psychology. Perhaps they are avoiding tragedies at home.

But above all, there is nothing manly to come to a girl with money, and pay for a few minutes of what? Illusion, warmth? Romantic people think it is bad, perhaps we should say, that it is practical. Nevertheless, it is not erotic.

I have planted trees because I had the vision of a forest. I think that making love to the woman you love is like planting a seed. Nothing comes close to that.

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The sad legacy of manhood

In Uncategorized on January 13, 2010 at 1:46 pm

Last night I was reading Richard Llewellyn’s “Up, Into The Singing Mountain” which is the sequel to “How Green Was My Valley”. And Huw Morgan is talking about his love of Bronwen. There is that wonderful sentence I would have liked to write myself. “There is no must to marriage. There is a man and a woman, and nothing else.”

And he continues saying: “There is more love in our distance than in the twining of arms.”

Well.

There is self-discipline and abstinence in love. There is asceticism, but it is not work, at least not like we understand work nowadays. In French, we use the word travail for work, and its meaning is one of suffering, but also of delivery of the child. If love is delivery of a child, then yes, love is work.

Huw Morgan loves Bronwen, and yet he makes love to Ceinwen. Can a man love two women? Yes, exactly like a woman can love two men. There are different sorts of love. There is the love of the mother for her child, and the love of the woman for her man.

The love for the child is unconditional. The love for the man is different. It is sexual love, understanding and trust. Men should envy how women can love. Women endure and suffer, but they love more.

A man is born to father children. He is the one holding the promise and the legacy of his fathers. And there is nothing more beautiful in the life of a man, but to find the woman he will love and make children with.

And yet, the man knows that to become father is to return to the dust of his fathers. When Huw Morgan is walking up the hill to his home, as his mother is dead, and all those he knew are dead, he is but the bearer of the message of his fathers. They are singing within him.

A man is but a world of sons and lovers. The world of a woman is pregnant with life and eternity. When we think of origin of life, we think of the womb. Never do we think of the man.

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Women did it! So can Men!

In Uncategorized on January 10, 2010 at 11:53 am

Woman at work

Why men should consider the risk of feminine resurgence as an opportunity to achieve full potential in their lives

Time for hand in glove

Time for hand in glove

“The Economist” published “We Did It!”, an interesting article about Women at Work. Within a few months women will constitute the majority of American workforce. Women are already toping men in terms of academic achievement in OECD countries. However they are still under represented at the top of companies and remain underpaid. This is because women in their 20s and 30s face the problem of raising their children and remain competitive in terms of career. Both business and governments have tried to address this issue as they need the talent and grey cells of women by bringing more flexibility in the workplace and introducing laws. There are still problems, though, as society is adjusting to this balance of power.

Men feel threatened by women at school and in the workplace because women are highly competitive and motivated. Men fail to understand that the resurgence of feminine power is an opportunity to redefine themselves as protective pillars, instead of just money care-takers. This explains why successful and ambitious men attract women. They don’t focus on the money-sex-family balance, but on a dynamic and competitive evaluation of real manly values, like entrepreneurship, risk and audacity.

Traditional gender roles are misinterpreted, too. Men and women continue to believe  that there is an established balance of responsibilities according to characteristics of strength, endurance and even brain adaptability to perform certain tasks. As I stated to fellow soldiers in the Army, a woman of same weight and body corpulence has 70% of a man strength, meaning that 30% edge is manageable with combat technique. Traditional gender roles are the result of societal evolution, not genetics.

In Ancient Greece competition for power between men and women had tragic consequences. The Queen was the Voice of the City-Goddess and mated with males by force. Honeymoon was brief and ended with the death of the male. The rites of Demeter, Goddess of Earth, fertility and Harvest, were sexually violent and bloody. The tribes which invaded Greece changed that balance of power and established Kings as consorts of Queen-Priestess-Witch. The story of Oedipus illustrates that struggle for power. Oedipus married his mother, but it was the Mother of the City, the High Priestess. The Sphinx had a woman’s head because it challenged the King with dark knowledge of sorcery.

History of sex provides interesting clues regarding the balance of power in society. We know the name of Roman emperors, but we forget to mention the role of women, as mothers, counsellors, and even challengers. Caligula murdered his mother because her influence was too great. Sexually speaking, women had the power to choose and decide. The story of Servilia, mistress of Julius Caesar, and mother of Brutus, is telling us that in spite of all Roman virtues of manhood, women enjoyed great power since the days of the Sabines. Sabines women were abducted by Romans, and yet saved them from the fury of their brothers and fathers.

Christianity affected the balance of power, as women were subjected to obedience within the context of familial harmony. Romans failed to find virgins to become Vestals, but Christian religion made thousands of women choose virginity willingly. Religion emphasised so-called gender rules, which eventually became traditional.

If we consider the 18th century sexual liberation, both in terms of literature and Arts, it is a reaction to the religious wars of the 16th century and first attempts to separate Church from State. Balance of power shifted in favour of women, as they gained access to education and business. Napoleon would never had become Emperor without the influence of Josephine. She was the one who introduced him to the circles of power and influence in the City.

The industrial revolution of the 19th century led to major economic growth and transformation of society. With “Eugenie Grandet” Balzac has painted the portrait of a society where women were pursued for capital. The Bourgeoisie fought a determined battle against any shift of power in favour of women, who were isolated and married by force, hence the need for romantic writing and heroes. Emile Zola’s women are fighting for economic recognition and social status.

The traditional gender roles of today are the result of 19th century romantic ideals and responsibilities, as Man is the Lord Protector and Woman the Caretaker of Home and Children. Two World Wars have made these roles obsolete. Women were needed in armament industries and every department of economic life, as men were fighting and dying on battlefronts. Rainer Werner Fassbinder’s “The Marriage of Maria Braun” is the story of a German woman whose husband is missing in action, and who has sex with a Black American soldier to learn English and have food. When the husband unexpectedly returns, she kills the American, and the husband accepts to plead guilty. She will eventually become a free woman, highly successful, until the final return of the husband, and their suicide.

Men fear the resurgence of power of women, because women tend to adopt men’s strategies and tactics to their advantage. Men are afraid to be dominated in the same way they used to dominate at work and at home. They fail to understand that the role of Lord Protector is restrictive and ill-adapted to the nature of men, which is to fight and conquer, explore and secure new frontiers. Divorces and violence are a result of deep male frustration in that fake role of Protectors. The economic resurgence of women will free men and make workplace and home more secure and balanced. Men will be able to spend more time with their children. Daughters and sons will have a real father who cares. Women will enjoy a more satisfying life, both at work and home, where they will be able to pursue career and life as a loving wife, without feeling prisoner of their gender.

There are questions, though. Will women dominate as men used to? Will they lose their feminine sensitiveness and turn into “males”, as they top the pyramid of business? Will men seize that opportunity for achieving full potential in their lives without losing control and trust in themselves? We may not need the violence of Atia and Servilia of Ancient Rome, but a Julius Caesar would be nice. His evenings were torrid and bloody, and would keep us away from our laptops and televisions!

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How to stop procrastinating

In Uncategorized on January 9, 2010 at 11:59 am
Pleasant evenings

Pleasant evenings

Procrastination becomes Art with the talent of Marcel Proust, but most talented people have issues with it, including myself. The purpose of this article is to understand why we procrastinate and how we can get things done.

There are numerous reasons to procrastination.

  • The desire of perfection
  • Luxury of time
  • Lack of focus
  • Academic education
  • Lack of, or conversely too much confidence in oneself
  • Weak character
  • Selfishness
  • Sexual in-satisfaction

Fortunately there are ways out of this. Let us examine the reasons and try to find out together the solutions, will you?

The desire of perfection is the nemesis of talented ambitious people. The origin of this can be a successful academic education. Because academics are focusing on quality instead of disposability, this is often leading to real issues when it comes to deliver a report on schedule. Napoleon said that he would be the master of Europe, if only he could get that flour and ammunition on time to his armies.

Overconfidence and paradoxically lack of confidence can lead to procrastination. You can feel so sure of yourself than you know you can do it at the very last moment, and conversely you can delay because you feel you can’t do it. Both reasons are signs of a weak character and possibly the sign of a deeper problem. Think about it. How did you feel about it in the past? Don’t hesitate asking a psychiatrist. This can be rooted in childhood, sexual abuse, etc.

Someone with friendly intentions just wrote to me about this advise and how I could use it as suppository.

Procrastination is a luxury. Most people don’t procrastinate, because they have no choice. Consider yourself a spoiled person. And take advantage of that to do a better job and be thankful to God for the time and opportunities in your life. Procrastination is a chance, if you know how to use it properly.

Procrastinating people have issues with sex. I procrastinate, therefore I am not good at sex. I have issues with sexual satisfaction, and I am procrastinating a lot, so that I can talk from evidence. Great procrastinators are also great masturbators. Writers, painters, poets and musicians have issues with sex. Art is expression of sexual dysfunction. Porn actors are usually stupid and have no imagination at all. This is why they don’t procrastinate. I have trouble imagining Marcel Proust balling away, and you?

So there are ways out of procrastination.

  • Russian roulette (messy)
  • Sex (with a talented prostitute)
  • Death (obviously)
  • Siberia (now you feel like Doctor Zhivago)
  • Unemployment (the safest issue)

I have tried unemployment. It is safe, but not efficient. Siberia, hmm, I was close enough with Moscow in January. So next option is sex with a prostitute. Male, of course. I have to do some sacrifices.

What is your way out of procrastination?

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True Romance

In Uncategorized on December 31, 2009 at 8:54 pm

I hate romance. For instance, there are hotels with honeymoon packages. Why don’t they deliver the baby, too? I mean, all of this is fake. As fake as those tractor love stories, where the man is displaying a hairy chest and oily hands, while the girl is experiencing erection of her nipples. Who can believe that?

Romance is not about hairy chests glistening in the sun, at least for straight people. Romance is unexpected and cruel. It is destroying lives, and opening new perspectives. Turning a father into a boy. Turning a boy into a father. No honestly, romance is the matter of Scary Movie.

And yet the myth endures. Against all logic and scientific data. Romance is there.

My cell phone antenna is larger than yours!

Okay, in the Stone Age, it was swiftly concluded. The romantic rival is quickly dispatched with a split skull, and the girl is pulled to the nuptial place with her hair. In the Middle Age, it was about the same, but duels between pretenders could take days, leaving plenty of opportunities for the Belle to lose her maidenhead.

In the Digital Age, duels for the Belle are done with SMS and flexible cell phone antennas. Opportunities for sexual escape are limited, considering that about all guys of today display a tendency to being gay. All in all, we have come to a sorry conclusion of the romantic evolution, and perhaps we should seriously consider Stone Age advantages.

So I said I hate romance, because people talking and writing about it have absolutely no idea. They think it is like a kind of game, pleasant and soft, where both lovers are exchanging words and kisses. But no, romance is tough business. We should have been born with hermaphrodite sexuality, and all humanity would already be pioneering the Universe.

But no, we are born Man or Woman, or both, but that is not my subject. We are born to research our completing half. Of course we dream of a beautiful maiden, intelligent enough to have a job, but not too intelligent, so we can enjoy our male superiority with computing and driving. But that is bullshit. It is so wrong.

I don’t believe that Gods are playing with Men. They have their own marital issues. But we are not immortals, so we have limited time. And it is with frantic obsession that men and women drive too fast with sports convertibles, and abuse their breasts with layers of silicon. Again, it is not working that way.

Look at advertisement campaigns. You have the guy running after a girl with flowers. So what does that mean? He is in love, or she needs to change her after shave? You have women running like squirrels, while the man is stalking them. Unshaved, shirt open on hairy belly, with the look of total stupidity. While she is resting, as running is tiring, he comes from behind, and Bam! Hmmm, in general, how many of these guys get a job as soprano, once their balls have been ripped off?

No, seriously. Romance is not a game. But it is true that as a lover I have ran more than Zatopek. Romance is tiring, get ready with vitamins. You must be answering calls day and night. Write long letters until your arms are trembling. Learn to cook and brush teeth. Lose weight and find a honorable work. Board planes at any time. Make love like a U.S. basket team.

There should be Olympics of Romance. Nature is showing us the way. But we have grown soft. As soft as our cell phone antennas. And our love songs have grown into sirups of cries and laments. Hail the Stone Age lover! So quick, not very smart, and smelling like old socks.

Dear Reader, it is a terrible thing to believe in fairy tales. Generations of girls and guys have failed their procreating seasons, walking around and sending cries of seduction, expecting for the desired one to appear. What they have forgot to tell you about fairy tales, it is that there is always an ogre. Oh, nothing fancy like Big Joe with Axe in hand, walking the woods, singing merry tunes. No, Ogres have different faces. They are Time, Work, Career, Money.

Oh, but it is all right, those ogres we know how to deal with. Are you so sure? Because romance is about walking the woods and ignoring the fear of the Ogre. You begin to see my point, romance in packages, honeymoons, all of this is inspired by ogres. It is nice package, but it is still a package.

Next time I will tell you nice stories about romance, and you will see that we are far, very far from the fairy tale portrait. It is a cruel miracle. Cruel, indeed.

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A Romantic Affair

In Uncategorized on December 26, 2009 at 11:42 am

A romantic affair is a bridge thrown over an abyss. There is no turning back without betraying who you are. A romantic affair is a journey from which you will either return transformed, or not return at all. Avalon it is, for true lovers. They sail away, and their story is matter of legends.

It all begins with a smile. A special acknowledgment of your presence. Touching words in a letter. Joy of life. A friendly hug. At heart, it is a shared need to be together. Imagination is instrumental.

It all began for me at night in front of a computer display. Welcome to a networked world. Am I ready? Yes, I am, Cisco Systems.

I saw her online in a dating agency. I could not believe it. This is a jewel, a diamond. Out of thousands of tagged portraits, she was the only one I noticed. It was Her. With beating heart, I launched the contact process. She will never answer, she is too beautiful, too young, too much above everything I could have expected.

By Russian standards, age difference is not important. A man is a man in his forties. A young girl is 16. 25 is not so young, told me Irina. So strange, because in France, a relationship between a man of 40 and a girl of 25 is already stretching some unwritten code of conduct.

In France a man of 40 with a girl of 16 is normal if she is Black. Positive discrimination, it is called there. If she is white, it is the matter of another Nabokov drama. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Hermit Secret, or how to be successful with girls with minimal impact on global warming

In Uncategorized on December 7, 2009 at 9:27 am

I was in a dark library room when I first heard about the Black Pamphlet. It was closing time, and people were in the process of getting up and leaving. It is a nice moment to sit back and observe. Like in the movies. Or in an airplane. When everybody is getting close, I mean that close, and wait thirty minutes in the main alley of the aircraft, while you are finishing your book, or having a nap. Read the rest of this entry »

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Smile at life

In Uncategorized on July 21, 2009 at 10:39 am
Brueghel, Summer.

Brueghel, Summer.

I was waiting in a queue behind an old woman at the local supermarket cashier. The morning was hot and heavy with the brooding promise of thunderstorm in the evening. I was struggling with bottles and various stuff, as I dislike those awful plastic purchase panniers. You look so queer with that dangling pannier. Anyway, what’s the use since you cannot use it for carrying stuff to your car? Read the rest of this entry »

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Pornography: Lolita Reloaded

In Uncategorized on June 30, 2009 at 8:35 am

Durex is exploring the six known dimensions, including the black holes of universe, where dreams falter and even hope fails. I said, six as I included the dimension of Manhood between the coiled sexual power of a jungle cat behind black rimmed glasses and the brow of a blue whale pointing the finger of God at you. That much traveled dimension has been rumored to host incredible species of indigenous oddities, like black snakes of Alabama, or white escargots de Bourgogne. Durex has sent the Enterprise investigating that dimension, with Captain Kirk on the verge of apoplectic implosion, and the black radio girl, already crying out:

— Captain Kirk, Captain Kirk!!!
— Yes?
— Captain! It is horrible! Nothing is going on!

Yes, how terrible, so much science, courage, money invested in a journey beyond space and time in a dimension where navigators are known to disappear for thousands of years. Some vessels are crushed between giant mammary glands. Other reports have stated giant pillars.

With horror stories of the like, Durex has sent the best scientists Earth could muster. There is the moronic American with a video camera at hand, ready to shoot. The French is wondering if the food will be good while the German has already packed for a sex tour in Thailand. The Italian is joking, but nervously fingering his crucifix. The Russian is the one singing Partisan songs, ready to take on those Fascists of the Sixth Dimension.

And as the vessel is going ever deeper and exploring ever further, there is that nexus of all things, called with dread the Nabokov pubic triangle, with two suns giving light to a strange cosmic anomaly, explorers have called the gravity well of two Slavic eyes.

The Nabokov Complex

The Nabokov Complex

And here is displayed the final drama of all erotic psyche. A Lolita considering that Mound Builders were like those who painfully built the Babel tower.  Always higher, and yet always farther from reaching Heaven, a proof of the futility of Man when it comes to imagining the true Mystery of what is going on in the mind of a Lolita.

To the whole crew of the Enterprise only remains the AntiMatter charge as last weapon. The Durex Condom. Name it, use it, and you are back from sixth dimension, with shaking hands, racing heart, and a big problem at hand. How to use it.

Written after crawling out of bed, before taking on another day in the happy shade of my trees.

Frederic W. Erk

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The Indian Runner

In Uncategorized on June 28, 2009 at 4:09 pm

It is middle afternoon of a hot Sunday. A normal person would be asleep under the cool shade of a tree. Or sipping ice-cold lemon drink with his wife and children. Talking with the gentle voice of a man at peace with the world and himself.

Un Dimanche à la Campagne by Bertrand Tavernier is an introduction to slow life and erotic dreams. For Mikhalkov in Utomlyonnye solntsem it is the last lovemaking with his beloved wife, an exercise of silence in the hot intimacy of a dressing room. It could be two lovers entwined in bed, while a window shutter is leaving in the scent of a hot afternoon when even birds are asleep in the trees.

For Sacha Guitry, Sunday was the day for lovemaking, and it was essential to recall that if you made love on Saturday, what would you do on a rainy Sunday, play cards? So that with lovemaking in spite of all British erotic literature about the sturdiness of country lads, and the French élan for les choses de la chair, lovemaking is an Art in anticipation and contentment.

When Anger is Boiling

When Anger is Boiling Up

This is why pornography is so wrong, because it is so sterile and fastidious. Watching pornography movies is like watching the French national team play football, or a German criminal investigation. Desperate Housewives is comic and lively compared to a porn movie.

It is sterile because the body of man and woman are displayed with a clinical approach to sexuality. It is sterile because the sexual act is performed without affection or even pleasure.

Fastidiousness of pornography originates from a mechanical repetition, something like a Charlie Chaplin version of Modern Times. We used to have factories with chain workers, now we have chain fuckers. It is fastidious because sexuality becomes a ritual of erections and grunts in sacrifice to a deity of Boredom and Vacuity.

As a young boy my first impression of pornography was explosive. Later as a soldier porn movies were part of guard duty, so that alternatively you checked out your gun, and then your zipper. I cannot see a French Colonel without thinking about that incredible scene which happened in Berlin back in 1994.

As we returned from shooting range in the middle of a winter night, we found out that one assault rifle was missing. Not that it was dangerous, since the French Republic is so sparse with bullets. Little ammunition made for short wars, or lengthy peace talks. But we had to endure the wrath of a French Colonel, while in the adjoining room a porn movie was playing out silently. I will always remember his gesticulating body with the woman displaying openly her charms to us. The combination of both would have brought a smile to the face of Mozart.

The fastidiousness and sterility of pornography are a consequence of a total misunderstanding of true sexual desire. Much has been said about the scandalous aspect of pornography, which is only partly true. Because pornography is not only about pneumatic sexual performance in acrobatic positions, the amiable consumption of billions of sperm, but dramatically so commonplace to about every activity of today.

Supermarkets stuffed with food. Poultry on show. Exotic fruits lasciviously awaiting you. Chocolate and pastries to make your cholesterol jump in anticipation. Wine and liquors to make even the most seasoned barfly fibrillate with joy. Women introducing you to rebates and new products. This is 19th century pornography and it takes the zeal of a monk, or the discipline of a poor man to remain stoic in spite of the temptation to seize those fruits of passion.

The true sin of pornography is about revealing so much that you feel satiated for weeks. Indirectly though relentlessly pornography is destroying sexual drive and genuine desire, and soon the sex junkie will walk the virtual alleys of licentious content with the sardonic smile of the veteran, or the blank indifference of the decadent.

Perhaps the worst kind of pornography is the licensed one, totally legal, and yet totally decadent. You name it, advertisement. It is full of German Audi cars with a message of “If you have the car, you will have the woman.” Grunts of pleasure are expected as if lettuce, tomatoes, dish washer and toilet paper had aphrodisiac properties. Every morning your letterbox will explode with giant images of fruits, cars, ham. This is one reason why older men check out the box in the morning.

There is the pornography of a popular television journalist reaching out for his audience. The intentional poor grammar and intonation of a Patrick Poivre d’Arvor. The knowing smile of a politician for his public. All this is about anticipated and auto-congratulatory content. Festival de Cannes. Pornography it truly is.

There is institutional pornography. Is it not pornography to show Saddam Hussein hanging, or U.S. President Bill Clinton explain that fellatio is not sexual intercourse within the context of American Law? What about the bombing of Bagdad or Palestine with white phosphorus artillery shells?

Since pornography is omnipotent, which is amusing, is there a way out of it? Not really. But perhaps in spite of it. There is a weapon of choice, which is humor. I mean, the real humor, not the grossly vulgar one of today, which is leading to despair. True humor is a way of survival and sanity, a sign of wits taking over.

Mankind has survived historical catastrophes with humor. And this is the reason why laughter is forbidden in totalitarian states. Pornography has a collateral damage, which is ridicule. Bankers display obscene profitability, while the economy is in deep crisis. Smile! Porn professionals are always so serious at work. Smile! Have you noticed how tennis players are serious, too? Smile! Sarkozy is promising economic growth, Smile again!

Of course there is another darker pornography. Like the deep shade of an ancient forest this pornography is displaying hellish content to an audience of social outcasts and parasites. Even laughter cannot prevail then, but the righteous anger of the father and mother. The terrible thing is that commercial advertisement is playing with the thin red line of Darkness. Gradually news and society evolve toward normalization of human criminal behaviour, which would have been unthinkable a few years ago. Is that the New Frontier of tomorrow? Maddoff negotiating centuries in jail, but where are the billions he stole? How come death penalty is not applied for economic crimes?

So that you would object to my comparing Heart of Darkness to that seemingly innocuous lascivious game of showing a woman trading sexual service for a ride in an expensive sedan, but is it not already spawning the decadence of our daily lives? Perhaps I should consider that obscene spilling of flesh, food, and motorised fleets as a sign of a lively society. And walk on in spite of it.

As long as I can genuinely laugh about it, yes.

A little boy is telling us a story of his parents going to their bedroom once in a month. Then it is an eruption of grunts and heaves. While in fact parents are checking their respective bills.

A wise American once said that he did not know what pornography was, but he recognised it when he saw it. I completely agree with that statement.

Frederic W. Erk

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The Emperor’s New Mind

In Uncategorized on June 27, 2009 at 1:28 pm

Statistics is the stuff of legends. Statistically, what were the chances of David taking on Goliath successfully? Statistically, what are the chances of a man in love to understand the true nature of the love of a woman? With statistics, there would be no history of Greece, no Thermophiles or Alexander. Julian the Apostate would be Emperor of Rome and perhaps the history of Europe would have been different.

Statistics is the stuff of Legends, because everything becomes possible with statistics. There is no 100% or 0%, but fractions of eternity and infinity. Chances I have to become rich before 40? Chances I have to marry the woman I love? Hmm, definitely worth looking for a looking glass, but possible, it is.

And from statistics have spun a world of possibilities like Athena has spun from the mind of Zeus. Fully armed and battle-ready possibilities. With statistics Sarkozy is the President of France, who is enjoying a popular support. 12% is some kind of support. This sounds so Russian. When is a Russian really drunk? Perhaps a new branch of statistics should investigate this. Is it a matter of lateral support like American soldiers on parade ground? Is it a genetic genius to roll with Earth magnetic field?

Are you sure you want to know?

Are you sure you want to know?

Statistics rule, because like the Oracle of Delphi there are an infinite possibilities of interpreting statistics. Goebbels was a Genius of Statistics. He could prove that by 1945 Germany was really on the verge of total victory. It is better than “Not One Step Backward!”, it is “A Giant Leap Backward”. Retreat becomes tactical shortening of front lines. A lost city is but an opportunity for encirclement. Mass bombing is but a proof the enemy is desperate. Russians talking in the Reichstag? But opportunity to practice foreign language skills.

What would be the world wide web without statistics? Every time I am connecting on my blog, I am subjected to a lecture in statistics. The slow growing number of readers has about the energetic impulse of a geriatric cure for impotence. Without search engines focusing on pornographic content I would enjoy the popularity of a website dedicated to … Let me think? What is the absolute less popular issue worldwide? Religion, you must be kidding. Science, not now that Michael Jackson is gone. So perhaps a Congress of Urology in A Coruna? With a slogan like “Exploring the Vast Ocean of Research” which is a nice image for people dealing with piss.

Many attempts have been made to apply statistics to military science. Missing In Action. Killed in Action. I wonder what it means to be missing in Un-Action. Or killed when nothing happens. To the dead one, it hardly matters. But for Stalin, it mattered. Any Russian soldier MIA would be a deserter. Lots of deserters, then. Americans hate MIA, it sounds so bad on AAR (After Action Report, or more commonly called Post Coitus Crisis). Many armies leave cemeteries after their departure. The great defeat of Roman Legions near Constantinople left hundreds of thousands of skeletons, men and horses, for dozens of years, gently contributing to soil fertility.

Statistics of death are essential to American war doctrine. With the publication of the Pentagon papers in the early seventies, nuclear deterrence became nuclear stock exchange. Soviet lose 100 Millions, we Americans lose less, statistically speaking. Statistics are the Nemesys of American doctrine ever since Mao Ze Tung simply replied to General MacArthur nuclear threat, with a So we lose a million or two.

Now that nuclear submarines are tracking Taliban fighters in river beds, perhaps even in drinking water, statistics of war in Afghanistan are all about building schools for girls, 650 according to United Nations, while only one has been planned meaning that the old school is gone to make room for a new one. Since the war in Vietnam body count is essential to fueling statistics. About every VC or Victor Charlie, or Charlie killed was a General, or at least a Colonel. Calculations had been made for how many ammunition had to be used to kill a single VC. Let’s say more than for the whole battle of Normandy?

Statistics are nice for our modern societies, too. It is another application to a more intimate war. Unemployment, bank loans, profitability, productivity, stupidity. Reading the French unemployment statistics is lecture in creative writing. Think about Alexandre Dumas on Amphetamines. President Sarkozy is of course the Saviour. And as every Saviour, he needs a Cross, which is Madame Carla Bruni Sarkozy. Aramis, Athos and Porthos? All Ministers. Perhaps a good role for Rachida Dati as Milady de Winter? At least she earns the distinction of Putana, statistically speaking.

Statistics for environment? I am sure that Russians would welcome one or two days with less cold next winter. Earth is heating up. Now that China is discovering the pleasure of SUV and family sedans, we are of course pedaling on electric bicycles manufactured in China. Call it as you like, but there is something like heat exchange in economy, which is so much like our Gulf Stream and thermocline.

Statistics for pleasure? Any MacDonald’s is but a factory of statistics. How much sugar to make the meat more palatable? How much cholesterol and estrogens to keep our blood charged and balls useless? Ask a manager about the standard deviation in distance to vomiting. Their restrooms are strategically located.

Condom manufacturers are surfing on the wave of statistics. Seven Year Itch? Penis size is frantically monitored and super computers design shapes of the future. No need for Alien Resurrection, Durex has it all. From the largest African size to medium European, and the smaller military kit liberally distributed to soldiers. Perversion of the manufacturer? Or realistic analysis of combat readiness? Name it, Durex has the shape for it.

Statistics are truly leading the world to a brighter future. Psychiatrists rely on statistics, now that Church has made it clear that there would be no miracle. Presidents and deputies love statistics, even if they should investigate on the probability of ridicule leading the world. For scientists, statistics are essential, and they would copyright them, if they could. Between failure and success, love and hate, there is infinite number of probable outcomes. Statistics are lifting mood, as long as you don’t have to work on them.

Statistics are a wonderful invitation to a world before the Sin. Not Abel and Cain, but the Sin of Einstein dreaming, something like Doctor Bloodmoney. With statistics we have a survival probability of 13% for the next one hundred years. Sarkozy is parading with mere 12%, so there is a margin for hope.

With statistics we shape women as the future of man, an extrapolation of Playboy and Hustler. The finger of God is not directed at his Son in the Sixtine Chapel of Rome. Oh no! That finger is the Photoshop marvel, which transforms Monsters in Women. Down with Gargoyles and Hieronymus Bosch mutations! Now we have Angelina Jolie. She is the ultimate Durex Invention: the Great Spermicide. Chances of surviving Her?

So what are the statistics that you have read this story to the end? Hmm. Another nice thing about stats is that there are no negative ones. As we say now in France, there is no recession, but negative growth. Next time I see Madame Carla Bruni Sarkozy I will have negative erection, too. Probability: 100%.

FREDERIC W. ERK

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Lost in Translation or Just Lost?

In Uncategorized on June 4, 2009 at 11:28 am

It is often said that the good reader makes the good book. And it is true if the book is written with your guts, not within the context of “expected readership”. So again the book becomes a Journey through time and space, and the good reader is the one exploring and discovering, as no one is ever on the Path, without wanting to explore himself, too. Adieu Sauvage, Adieu Voyage wrote Claude Levy-Strauss. We are hunting our Dragoons of Eden. Read the rest of this entry »

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Woman: A Man’s Odyssey

In Uncategorized on May 31, 2009 at 6:30 pm

As I was milking my red wine gallon-sized reserve, a smile was brought to my face with the delicate attention required to extract to the last drop of that rather common, not to say, very basic wine. What a fight! And as always in those occasions when my attention is focused on manual work, my mind would wander those green valleys of imagination and recollection of past events and figures. So the smile became more subdued as I was thinking about all those images I have associated with women since I was a boy. Read the rest of this entry »